Vince's Journey

Today is my dad's birthday; he was born April 7, 1932 in Dayton, Ohio. He passed away in December of 1999 in Rochester, Minnesota. He was at the Mayo Clinic when he died - it is hard to believe its been close to 12 years since his death. He was only 67, he would have turned 79 today.

My dad was a man's man. I never saw him do any housework or cook, he worked Monday through Friday as an Ironworker and the weekends were his. There were eight kids in our family and it was my mom's job to do all the housework, cook meals, take care of the sick, get us up for school and drive us to any after school activites we might have. Dad's sole job at home was discipline and that he did quite well. I don't know if I speak for my siblings but I personally was very scared of my dad. He had a mean streak like no one I've ever seen. And he could carry on his mean streak for days. He could be downright unbearable to live with. And when he was on one of his mean streaks it was best to just steer clear of him because if you got in his path, you were going to be sorry.

But as mean and downright nasty as he could be, he was at times equally charming. When he was in a good mood he was a blast to be around - he told jokes, made you laugh and could be very generous. Unfortunately those occassions were few and far between. I always attributed his moods to the fact that he was raising 8 kids, living paycheck to paycheck and I'm sure it had to weigh heavily on his mind. I look back on my childhood today and I have to laugh - I'm sure ours was quite different from many of you who read this blog. It wasn't until I was older that I grew to appreciate my upbringing. And it wasn't until all us kids were out of the house and my dad neared retirement that he seemed to mellow and enjoy his family. Unfortunately he only got to enjoy a couple of years after retirement before he got sick and passed away.

I do miss him. When I went to college he used to come up to Ohio State to watch football games in the fall. We continued going to games when my brother, Rich, was a student at OSU. And he also developed an enjoyment of golf in his later years and I tried to play with him a couple times each summer. Those were times quite different from my childhood. I never felt like he wanted to be around us when we were kids and similar to the song 'Cats in the Cradle' there never seemed to be enough time to get together once I had my own family - and that's something I regret because I wish my kids would have been able to spend more time with him, to see the fun side that my brothers and sisters saw from time to time. Living away from Dayton I think our kids didn't get to see him as much as the grandchildren who live in Dayton. I do think my kids have fond memories of him - which is good. I just wish the past 12 years would have provided them with more memories - he left us far too soon. Happy Birthday, dad - we miss you!